Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
So much rum. So many feels.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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