He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
