You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
You're like the curious george of whores
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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