i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize