Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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