Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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