this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
