my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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