I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
