I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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