Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
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