This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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