Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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