I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
