I feel like I'm in dance class right now
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
