You really coming over, don't trick.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Randomize
