You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
