They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize