I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
