this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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