you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
