If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
my sisters under your porch take her home
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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