Its about making memories worth repressing
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
