Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
