i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize