how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize