CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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