So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
