Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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