The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
