New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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