It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
