No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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