is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
