He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
