She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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