well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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