He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
They left me at home... I'm a liability
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
