please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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