I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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