She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
