my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I need water and some morals
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
