if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
