omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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