Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
