How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
