Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
