We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
