arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
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