do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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