she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I want to fling myself into the sun
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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