he puts the penis in happiness.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
my shit smells like andre
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
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